What are your top two questions about working with relational trauma that you need to have answered

We asked you to tell us your top two questions about working with trauma that you absolutely needed to have answered in our upcoming trauma training course. 

And you answered. 

Your questions came in from around the world. 

Mountains of hope and inquiry.  Rumbling in from every shore.

These are great questions.  Each one a spark of a human heart reaching out.

I am humbled by the task ahead of us.  But one by one, step by step.  We will move forward.

We will try.

Thank you for risking to ask.

And perhaps, we may all find the answers to these together.

Here is a partial list. 

May we be brave. 
May we be steady. 
May we be strong.
May we work through what is unknown and difficult.

Together.

Photo credit: Hannah Busing @Unsplash

Here are some of the main categories of questions:

There were lots of questions that you asked, but here's the Main Categories of Questions:

1. Understanding Relational Trauma
- What are the underlying dynamics and impacts of relational trauma?
- What is relational trauma? And how is it different from shock trauma?
- Can you define Relational trauma in easy-to-use health care terms?
- What are the different types of relational trauma?
- I am unsure by the term relational skills, do you mean developing your relational skills when working with a client(s) or developing the relational skills of a client(s)?

2. Healing and Interventions
- How can professionals effectively intervene and support individuals affected by relational trauma?
- How to recover... what are some ways that can help to heal from relational trauma?
- Is the therapeutic relationship enough to heal relational trauma or is there a level of healing/forgiveness that has to happen in the damaged relationship to fully heal?
- How to know healing has occurred? What trackers are there to know healing has occurred?
- What are the top 5 techniques that help to heal somatic wounds?
- How to heal or work with relational trauma to help ourselves/ others heals, (so trauma doesnt get in the way) and able to create meaningful relationships?

3. Safety and Trust
- For children staying with caregivers who are the source of their trauma and insecure attachment, how to work with those children to establish the sense of safety and address relational trauma?
- How to quickly create safety and connection with clients who are skeptical and distrusting - hypervigilant nervous systems?
- How to assist them in developing trust again and feel safe in the world?
- How to lean into healthy relationships when closeness still feel unsafe in the nervous system?

4. Specific Trauma Situations
- How to heal early relational trauma that affects attachment?
- How to work with/coach clients with functional challenges such as ADHD/Executive Function that are the result of childhood relational trauma?
- How to heal from sexual abuse and co abuse (enabling parent e.g.)by a relative (e.g. stepfather, grandfather)?
- Healing from subtle narcissistic abuse (emotional, verbal, financial etc.) by a long-term "partner" and parent.

5. Therapist's Role and Self-Care
- How can the therapist best maintain their boundaries—transference and/or countertransference while also creating safety, connection, and a healing environment?
- Where might blind spots or shadows of the therapist show up and doing this work? And how will you be addressing this in this particular course?
- How do you best do relational work when you are continuously working through your own relational history?

6. Triggers and Associations
- How do I overcome associations? Ex: if I was abused with an item-associating similar item in every day life triggers abusive memory.
- What strategies help bring me back to present/make new safe associations?
- How to manage triggers in real time in my relationships?

7. Intergenerational Trauma
- Is mental illness something that skips a generation meaning if my mom had it amd I was fine but my daughter is exhibiting symptoms that means it does?
- How does one approach the complexity of Inherited Generational Trauma?

8. Couples and Relationships
- Practices that help couples reconnect sexually and sensually after a long period of no sex due to trauma.
- Help for the partner of a traumatised person that doesn't just come in the form of educating them about trauma in general, but gives them an actionable and insightful set of things to do and say (or not) to best support their partner.
- How much do I involve my partner in my healing process? ... and what if he doesn't want to be part of it?

9. Course Details and Expectations
- How does this differ from other courses?
- Once completed what does it qualify us to do, given that there are non psychological practitioners who are now supporting many through their health coaching businesses?
- Does this program have any prerequisites?
- Will you respect other spiritual beliefs and not expect clients to conform to yours?

These are great questions!

Thankfully, we have some great teachers who will be helping us address some of these questions.

And here are some of the specific questions!

AB ---  1) When sharing experiences of trauma with a licensed psychologist (or psychiatrist), what is the most optimal method the psychologist can use to make the client feel valued without the need to suggest medication to the client?

My thoughts: 

When clients share vulnerable stories of trauma, there's often an instinct as clinicians to immediately suggest medication to rein in strong emotions and regain control. But this can inadvertently send the message that a person's suffering is too much to handle. It can imply that their symptoms reflect some personal deficiency, rather than an understandable reaction.

Medication can quickly become a substitute for the painstaking work of building trust, safety and self-efficacy from the ground up. It can rob clients of the chance to tell their stories fully and be witnessed with compassion.

The most empowering path is to first demonstrate that extreme states can be handled with grounded calm and curiosity. Entering through physiology, not diagnosis, conveys that someone's inner experiences are valid, not pathological.

From this anchored place of acceptance, client and clinician can carefully weigh the pros and cons of medication with wisdom and agency. The client is positioned as the ultimate expert on their healing journey.

When we take the time to listen, attune and co-regulate without instantly medicating, we send the primal message: You are so much more than your trauma. You are resilient, resourceful and whole. Your symptoms make sense given what you have endured. Healing will come, and I will walk this road with you.

2. As a clinician, how do you define a "healed person" ?

As clinicians, when we define a “healed person,” we must understand healing as more than an absence of symptoms or achievements of external successes. Real integration means embracing our wholeness, including the messy, painful parts of ourselves and our stories.

A healed person is someone who can relate to themselves with compassion, curiosity, and care - someone who has made room for all aspects of their humanity. They don’t disown certain feelings or experiences as shameful or unacceptable. They don’t cling to a rigid narrative that amputates the uncertainties and contradictions inherent to being human.

A healed person recognizes that within each of us exist both light and shadow. They understand that psychological health is not about eradicating darkness, but illuminating it with conscious awareness. It’s about integrating and accepting all of who we are - our resiliency and our regrets, our pride and our pain.

Wholeness does not require perfection. Healing happens through presence, not championship. A healed person is integrated, not fragmented - they can embrace each breath, each moment, no matter how messy or beautiful, as part of the never-ending journey of becoming.

SN ---  What are the most effective ways to work with survivors of pre-verbal sexual trauma?  And how can therapy be used to help survivors learn basic skills that might not have had a chance to develop early in life?

My thoughts: 

When we think about pre-verbal sexual trauma, it's tempting to focus on the explicit memories and disturbing details. But what if the most damaging legacy lives not in the horrific events themselves, but in the implicit imprints left behind?

Let's look at Kaitlyn, a 28-year-old survivor of childhood abuse. On the surface, Kaitlyn seems successful - she's a lawyer with a busy social life. But under the veneer of accomplishment, she struggles to feel safe or connected. She startles easily, can't tolerate intimacy, and oscillates between emotional numbness and floods of anxiety.

Kaitlyn's explicit memories of abuse are broken and blurred, yet her body and nervous system still carry an implicit record. Like songs embedded on a scratched CD, the imprints skip and repeat: hypervigilance, disconnection, dysregulation. No amount of cognitive processing can smooth the grooves engraved before language.

Now meet Lisa, an attachment-focused somatic therapist. Instead of demanding detailed accounts, she helps Kaitlyn befriend her body. She invites curiosity, not confession. Through co-regulation, attunement and experimental movements, Kaitlyn's nervous system begins learning a new rhythm.

At first, change crawls. But as moments of regulation stretch from seconds into minutes into hours, the momentum builds. The stuck record finds a new groove. Kaitlyn can name her inner experience, set boundaries, and feel alive in her skin.

The key is entering through the back door of the body, where implicit memory holds sway. Lisa helps Kaitlyn's physiology rewrite itself in calmness. Only then can the frontal lobes make sense of it all.

The brain, after all, takes its cues from the body. Healing from early trauma requires listening to that deep somatic language. Rewire the physiology, and psychological change follows.

LB ---  How do you ensure someone equipped to handle the things that will come up for them? What is the best way to help someone integrate and process?

When working with trauma, there's a natural impulse to protect people from further suffering. We want to soothe distress and restore a sense of safety. But trauma is not integrated and processed by avoiding it. Healing requires gradually approaching and metabolizing the pain locked in the nervous system.

As therapists, we must develop the capacity to compassionately bear witness when clients touch into trauma resonance. Rather than reflexively redirecting to lightness, we have to hold space for the darkness.

This means finding each client's unique window of tolerance - not flooding them with intolerable emotion, but guiding them to gently contact what they have the resources to handle. Through somatic attunement and co-regulation, we build skills to navigate extreme affect without alarm.

With practice, we gain confidence that healing trauma necessitates bravely exploring its depths - we cannot circumvent the wound. Our role is not just to placate, but to help clients metabolize suffering so they can reclaim their lives.

When we equip ourselves to stay present and grounded, even amidst storms of catharsis, we can light the way for others. The path is never easy, but it is transformative. With courage and compassion, we can hold space for pain as the route to wholeness.

AG ---  In a culture that become so conditioned to quick results, what is a gentle, but effective way to prepare clients (and ourselves) for the length of this journey?

In our instant gratification culture, trauma healing can seem impossibly slow and meandering. When relief doesn't arrive swiftly, frustration follows. Client and clinician alike crave clear linear progress.

But trauma plates itself into our physiology in ways that defy quick unraveling. Like granite sculpted by relentless pressure over ages, our nervous system adapts to unspeakable distress over time. We cannot expect fast release from adaptations so long in the making.

As therapists, we must temper hopes for sudden transformation and prepare clients and ourselves for the marathon. Trauma processing happens in fits and starts, punctuated by periods of dormancy. Expecting constant momentum only breeds burnout.

Rather than harshly judging routine setbacks, we can normalize the nonlinear nature of this work. Gentle metaphors help – healing from trauma is like slowly thawing frozen soil, freeing each muscle to move again, decoding messages written in a foreign tongue.

With compassionate realism, we can find meaning in small steps forward – moments of regulation or self-awareness that signal nervous system shifts occurring below the surface. Holding space for incremental change prevents ruthless pressure for expedited “cures.”

Trauma’s grasp on body and psyche took time to cement; unwinding its grip requires patience and care. But when we walk this long road with realistic expectations, each hard-won milestone glows more radiantly.

JM ---  How to work w trauma without talking about the traumatic event.

When it comes to trauma, our impulse is often to push clients to verbalize explicit details, to speak the unspeakable. We want the story laid bare in orderly narrative so we can analyze and “treat” it.

But for many, directly recounting trauma triggers unmanageable distress or dissociation. The prefrontal cortex goes offline, rendering talk therapy ineffective. Or the hippocampus cannot locate clear explicit memories, leaving only fragmented sensations and emotions.

In these cases, gently working through the body and nervous system first provides a pathway to process trauma without having to narrate events. We can guide clients into mindfulness of visceral sensations, patterns of tension, and biological responses.

With compassionate curiosity, we help clients map the connections between triggers and their fight-flight reactions, creating new associations in the brain and body. We have them experiment with small movements or sounds to discharge blocked energies.

Gradually, as clients learn to befriend their own inner world, they feel less at the mercy of involuntary trauma responses. They develop skills to self-regulate, tolerate discomfort, set boundaries.

Only then, from this felt sense of security, can the story emerge organically at their own pace. But explicit details are not required for transformation. The journey centers on embodiment and agency, not confession.

With patience and attunement, we can work with the nervous system to rewrite trauma’s imprint – with or without the story. The path is in reclaiming wholeness and choice.

T ---  Scope of practice for non psychologist/psychiatrist therapist boundaries?

When treating trauma without a behavioral health license, it's vital we know our scope and when to refer out. Our goal is empowering clients within proper boundaries, not pretending expertise we lack.

Much depends on your particular background, training, and domain of competence.  So things vary, case by case.  In general, we can provide a supportive first port of call to listen, normalize reactions, and instill hope. But attempting trauma processing without proper training risks flooding clients and doing harm.

It is almost always permissible to help clients stabilize - managing symptoms, improving daily functioning. It is generally permissible to teach healthy coping skills, grounding tools, ways to tolerate discomfort and self-soothe.

But for individuals who suffer from clinically elevated behavioral health diagnoses or whose level of internal support is low, we should refer out for unpacking traumatic memories or maladaptive beliefs. Individuals without a behavioral health license also don't diagnose disorders or conduct exposure techniques that could destabilize without careful calibration.

Through embodiment and mindfulness practices, individuals without a behavioral health license can help clients gain emotional awareness and agency. But they should flag suicidal ideation, dissociation, or uncontrolled re-experiencing for prompt evaluation.

individuals without a behavioral health license have a scope that provides a doorway, helping clients build resilience until ready for deeper clinical work. They can walk alongside, bearing witness and fostering trust. But processing trauma requires specialized clinical training that it is important to obtain.  

Knowing our limits allows us to powerfully support clients while ensuring their care plan provides all they need to truly heal. The work can set the stage for deeper transformation.

L ---  Will I have to speak about things personal to me? to make it work? Will u tailor exercises to those without full mobility?

In trauma treatment, clients often arrive expecting they must painfully divulge every graphic detail for "it" to work. They believe their story must be scripted into perfect linear narrative to be valid.

But transforming trauma does not require exhaustive verbal disclosure if that feels unsafe or triggering. There are pathways in through the backdoor of the body and nervous system first. We can guide clients to gently notice their sensations, movements, and biological responses without having to confess specific events or thoughts.

From this place of embodied awareness, clients gain agency and choice over what feels safe to share vulnerably. They learn they can set the pace, that honoring their window of tolerance matters most. Their healing is not contingent on excavating anguished memories before they have the resources to handle them.

Similarly, exercises can be adapted to meet clients where they are physically. Not everyone can do grounding practices that require movement or posture changes. So we thoughtfully adjust to each client’s mobility limits, finding tools that work for their reality.

On this journey, no one has to endure unnecessary suffering or strain. Healing happens through meeting yourself where you are, then taking the next right step. The power is recognizing you already have access to everything you need inside.

TB ---  Working with clients who have experienced trauma related to sudden tragic deaths as in suicide, accidental deaths, child drownings, etc- when the trauma of the circumstance of the death interferes with the grief process, or vice versa-- intense grief limits the ability to address the effects/symptoms of trauma- inability to eat, sleep, nightmares, intrusive images. I am interested in learning how to more effectively help these clients who experience single event trauma and seek help early on, although they may also have a history of trauma as well. 

When tragedy strikes suddenly, grief and trauma intertwine in complex ways. Pain grips heart and body alike. Bereavement and shock trauma compound each other, making healing feel impossible.

In these cases, we cannot compartmentalize. The work integrates grieving the loss with processing its traumatic imprint. We hold space for the full cascade of emotions - sorrow, panic, anger, guilt.

Gently, we help clients find language for inexpressible pain. We guide them back into their senses, using grounding tools to manage dissociation and intrusive images.

Together, we unknot how trauma dysregulates the nervous system, hijacking healthy mourning. We help clients grasp that overwhelm is part of the journey, not a sign of going crazy.

No rush to closure. No judgment for the messiness of their process. We companion them in ritualizing goodbyes on their own sacred timeline.

While grief often comes in waves, trauma can linger silently until tended. So we gently encourage small steps to confront avoided aspects that delay integration.

Through it all, our calm presence conveys the promise of light after darkness. With time and care, life can slowly bloom again even if it never looks the same.

VD ---  1. I’ve been at several trainings recently where I hear pushback from older clinicians who state they are not comfortable with the “new generation” definition of trauma (by which they mean any of several things - that social media over diagnoses trauma, that people say they are traumatized by things that “should” not have affected them and these practitioners want to correct that but don’t know how,  and that these practitioners feel burdened by   having to act trauma-informed in ways they don’t fully understand.) How do we get past this, as a career field?  2. How do we move away from dividing clients into legitimate and not legitimate  and teach symptom relief rather than a PTSD scale score? Thank you!

The older generation of clinicians often recoils from the "new generation" understanding of trauma, feeling it over diagnoses normal stress and diminishes true trauma. They want to correct this perceived minimization of real trauma, but don't know how without invalidating younger peoples' experiences.

This dilemma reminds me of the social concept of "moral panic." Moral panic describes when society suddenly decides some person, group or thing is an evil threat. Often exaggerated claims spread quickly, even if the facts don't support the panic.

In the 90s, some claimed Dungeons and Dragons was linked to teen violence and suicide. It turned out role playing games were not actually a social ill, but the moral panic fed on parents' fears.

Today, veteran clinicians' discomfort with expanded trauma definitions has shades of moral panic. The clinician's role is to understand, not define, clients’ experiences. If a younger client says they have read something on social media and they have experienced trauma, explore their story. Ask about their experience. Reserve judgement.

Of course, clinicians must think critically about diagnoses and treatment. But the discomfort some feel around younger peoples' trauma stories often says more about the clinician than the client. It may reveal generational divides in trauma perception. It may expose the clinician's own trauma biases.

The path forward is dialogue, not correction. We must discuss differing views on trauma openly, without judgement. Only through building mutual understanding can we provide trauma-informed care to all.

Clinicians of any age who feel burdened by new trauma frameworks should express their concerns, but also listen. The wise approach is humility. None of us fully grasp another's suffering. But when we let go of "correcting" others' stories and focus on understanding them, we can build bridges across generational divides. In the end, our job is to treat people with compassion, not be the arbiters of whose trauma counts.

 Editorial note:  I will try to come back to these very good questions soon but am tapped out for now. (Albert)

NM ---  What are the best somatic skills to use in doing trauma work?

The quest to determine the "best" somatic skills for trauma work is a tricky one indeed. As with any complex human endeavor, there are no simple or absolute answers. The human body and psyche are endlessly nuanced, and trauma manifests in countless ways. Still, we must make an effort.

In my exploration, certain somatic practices stand out. Sensorimotor psychotherapy uses tracking skills to help clients get in touch with body sensations, promoting new neural pathways. Somatic experiencing helps discharge fight-or-flight energy stuck in the nervous system. Biodynamic breathwork accesses pre-verbal trauma through breathing exercises. Authentic movement encourages free expression through movement, rebuilding the mind-body connection.

Yet we must remember that no singular approach is universally effective. The "best" skills depend entirely on the individual client and therapist. A skill that proves tremendously effective for one may fail another. As with any human relationship, trauma therapy requires attunement, care, and trust between client and practitioner. A therapist must artfully weave somatic skills with other tools in their kit.

Ultimately, the "best" skills are those delivered with compassion, patience, and acceptance of each client's unique trauma profile and needs. More than any specific technique, the therapeutic relationship and the therapist's presence are key. There are no easy answers in healing trauma, but with dedication, care, and an open mind, we can uncover what works for each precious human who suffers from its debilitating effects. This is the greatest challenge, and the most worthy pursuit.

VT ---  1. How can I help my client experience changes, however small, that help them cope almost immediately (so that they will have hope, and a reason to continue the work)? 2. How can I show them, incrementally, that these changes are actually working?

Start small. Tiny steps.
Micro-progressions.

Focus on sensations.
Guide them inward.
Ground them in the present.

Breathe. Just breathe.
Relax the jaw. Loosen the neck.

Small somatic shifts
can ripple through the nervous system—
a wave of relief.

Validate that. However fleeting,
it is real.

Build on that sliver of hope.
Cultivate trust.
Enable courage.

Chart moods. Log sleep patterns.

Quantify the qualitative.

Observe physical cues.
Energy, breathing, heart rate.

Gather data points.
Paint a picture over time.

Celebrate slight upticks.
Reframe setbacks.

Remind them of how far they've come.
Show them it's working.

With patience and care,
in tiny steps, trauma can be healed.

SS -- For children staying with caregivers who are the source of their trauma and insecure attachment, how to work with those children to establish the sense of safety and address relational trauma?

K -- How to overcome 1)"I never want to trust anyone again" 2)"I never want to feel this again"

SJ -- How does this differ from other courses? Once completed what does it qualify us to do, given that there are non psychological practitioners who are now supporting many through their health coaching businesses?

MAV -- 1. What are the underlying dynamics and impacts of relational trauma? 2. How can professionals effectively intervene and support individuals affected by relational trauma?

R -- I am unsure by the term relational skills, do you mean developing your relational skills when working with a client(s) or developing the relational skills of a client(s)?

R -- How to recognize and differentiate from CPTSD? How to recover, ways that can help to heal from relational trauma?

HA -- 1. Practices that help couples reconnect sexually and sensually after a long period of no sex due to trauma. There are lots of Tantric practices out there but some do not feel safe with the energy movement and spiritual aspect of those, plus they might be too sexual to start. There are polyvagal practices but those are often not sensual and designed for an individual, not a couple. 2. Help for the partner of a traumatised person that doesn't just come in the form of educating them about trauma in general, but gives them an actionable and insightful set of things to do and say (or not) to best support their partner. When I've searched for this it has been frustrating because I tend to only find content that wants to focus on educating the partner about trauma. That's helpful but the question then becomes, "what do I DO about it to both be the best support and deal with my frustration?"

TSF -- I feel like I have been really looking at relational trauma for so many years (over 20 years) and many of my questions have been answered. So I don't have a very specific question, but my interest in this course comes more from a space of knowong that there are always things to learn, golden nuggets you get from different teachers, hearing things from a slightly different perspective, being in presence of others coming together out of curiosity in this topic.

SA -- interactional pattern between protective mechanisms and how to turn towards versus away when activated

AM -- Is mental illness something that skips a generation meaning if my mom had it amd I was fine but my daughter is exhibiting symptoms that means it does? Why then does said daughter treat me so poorly at times?

JF -- How do I overcome associations? Ex: if I was abused with an item-associating similar item in every day life triggers abusive memory. What strategies help bring me back to present/make new safe associations?

t -- I'd love to know what the differences are between healing a past relationship versus one that you are still in. (think grieving a violent spouse you left versus an addict spouse you are trying to support but hold yourself through also) Are there trends in the healing work?

VM -- Relational trauma within marriage / relationships? Relational trauma from childhood and how it affects and changes us into adulthood?

E -- 1) Is the therapeutic relationship enough to heal relational trauma or is there a level of healing/forgiveness that has to happen in the damaged relationship to fully heal? 2) How do you know/what trackers are there to know healing has occurred?

KR -- 1. How to help the person get to the root level issue of the trauma 2. How to help them feel safe enough to relax in the space of it, to discover what is underlying

SH -- What is to best way to reduce the stress of strong emotions?

AG -- What are the different types of relational trauma? What is the best way to tell a client they have relational trauma?

NM -- Hi Albert, This is really exciting! I would want to learn about navigating dynamics with exacting and highly demanding, perfectionist clients, and the fear this can trigger in the therapist of not getting it right, as well as clients who feel hopeless and tend to be combative, and who refuse to explore the possibility of medication.

BR -- 1. How to heal early relational trauma that affects attachment? 2. How to build healthy relationships when you have attachment trauma and you’ve been repeatedly wounded when you try to form relationships?

YPF -- How to motivate people towards working on their relational trauma when they seek therapy but there is resistance still? How to inspire hope when people are wounded and avoid relationships due to relational trauma?

KB -- when working with people who have late diagnosed neurodiversity, sometimes their relational trauma stems from their sudden inability to trust themselves. how can we build up their self trust again?

JW -- How to quickly create safety and connection with clients who are skeptical and distrusting - hypervigilant nervous systems. How can the therapist best maintain their boundaries / transference and/or countertransference while also creating safety, connection, and a healing environment? Especially with borderline personality disorder presentation.

HC -- If my relational trauma comes from my broken attachment with my mother-how can I ever really heal? If I still have contact with someone with whom I have relational trauma-How can I manage that better and can I still heal

PC -- 1. How to overcome the fragmented gut feelings to trust again? 2. How to overcome the fragmented sense of safety around others?

LS -- What are the best ways to engage with a client navigating relational trauma. In what ways can we invite in somatics.

F -- How is relational trauma different from other traumas? Thank you.

AD -- How much do I involve my partner in my healing process? ... and what if he doesn't want to be part of it? How to manage triggers in real time in my relationships.

L -- How to work with/coach clients with functional challenges such as ADHD/Executive Function that are the result of childhood relational trauma? How to work with fawning, freeze, numbing, self-invalidation, and shame?

MD -- How does the body respond

LP -- How to work with couples and find more balance where one partner has significant trauma and takes up all the space and energy of the session.

LA -- 1. Telehealth and trauma: benefits and risks in treatment 2. Based on specific trauma conditions, how does one assess the best intervention to 'wade in' to work with softening rigid defenses, and build hope?

LF -- Is this program for trauma survivors only? Can it help me with personal growth and development, such as discovering more about myself, liking myself, and clarifying my vision, passion, and goals? Does this program have any prerequisites?

DS -- How to trust again, and be around people who don’t get us and are hurtful

JB -- How to work with each individuals reality and support them in seeing one anothers reality, and being able to create a new perspective together- Validation and transformation. More specific to parent - child relational trauma- somatic practices to support an adult child when an adult parent is expressing large emotions. How can the adult child regulate and boundary themself from the adult parent.

v -- when is the next course? Do albert offer private consults?

PdL -- How can I resolve childhood trauma so I don't keep retraumatising myself by expecting an outcome that never happens? How can I see present relationships without being drawn back into past scripts deeply imprinted in childhood trauma?

MTR -- I require hands-on application through practice sessions and demonstrations using real case studies.

R -- How do I not leave someone worse off than when I spoke to them?

DS -- 1. Relational Trauma requires Relational Healing what defines a healing relationship. 2. Relational trauma becomes embodied in somatic structures what are the safest and most effective way for people to reclaim and repossess their own body?
TL -- 1) How to hold the suffering with tenderness and skill, and not be pulled under with the client? 2) How is this different than all the other "techniques" that clients with complex PTSD have "tried?"

KB -- When it comes to relational trauma, do we work and focus more on the symptoms or the source of the traumatic experience?

N -- I don't have specific questions in mind. I probably was aiming more to put together and continue building on (strengthening, expanding on) what I've learned about trauma over the past several years.

KB -- 1. When it comes to relational trauma, do we work and focus more on the symptoms or the source of the traumatic experience?
2. If the triggers are no longer triggers or have been recognized by the client, can the therapist then consider this as a healing process?

ZU -- 1. how will this training prepare me for working with clients that have experienced trauma? 2. how equipped will I be to handle working with someone without having the training/ licensure as a MH practitioner?

AK -- Please speak on the relationship of transference and counter transference in the provider/client relationship.
That's really all I can think of at this moment in time.

M -- Where might blind spots or shadows of the therapist show up and doing this work? And how will you be addressing this in this particular course

V -- How to deal with issues where you get traumatized if you come accross someone with similar characteristics as the person who has traumatized you. If you have to work with this similar personality and you are constantly getting triggered, how to react in that situation and manage your emotional state. How to take care of someone who is experiencing this issue. If this person who has hurt you is your family member and wants to reconcile, how to feel normal around them again.

SC -- Working beyond talk therapy Options for working in different contexts and impacts in timeframes Eg brief v medium term

HW -- 1. How do I/we create safety, connection and trust with clients who have attachment injuries? 2. How do I/we repair ruptures in a therapeutic setting?

LC -- How do you heal never feeling safe How do you heal never feeling good enough

L G -- What is relational trauma? And how is it different or/& compliments, integrates . How is it diffent from your trauma somatic practitioners certificate course? I’m interested, how can I be a part of this program? Do you offer any scholarships for students who are on very low income?

DLG -- What are the top 5 techniques that help to heal somatic wounds Strategies for clients who struggle with disassociation due to childhood trauma

KY -- 1. When is it better to work with relational trauma in the context of an actual relationship (e.g., couples counseling, family constellations) vs. outside of one (e.g., in individual therapy)? 2. What are different ways to work with attachment wounds and when are they appropriate?

Sp -- Can you define Relational trauma in easy-to-use health care terms..

AK -- 1. how to work with the (sometimes) very rigid beliefs associated with relationship trauma (ie. beliefs around blame/"my fault" and "if my parents/caregivers/family/people who were supposed to love/carefor/protect/want me then I cannot trust anyone"). i often see this tied up with a fear of abandonment 2. how to help support clients who KNOW they will not get a different response/experience going to a parent for support as an adult, because they've never gotten it in the past. i find there is a pull toward this relationship for years because of the underlying beliefs. it seems almost automatic for people to override what they know (when not triggered for activated) and get hurt over and over and over. thanks for what you do!

PW -- Will you respect other spiritual beliefs and not expect clients to conform to yours

L P -- How to learn on how not to be reactive when triggered. How toxic bonds begin.

jk -- Trauma that occurs from abusive relationships whether physical or emotional.

MR -- Is it possible to begin the sessions any earlier? I found the 9pm (UK) starts for the trauma course very challenging.

MNF -- How can you help someone become aware of their self-soothing (shame cycle) mechanisms? And how can you do this in a way that brings awareness and motivation to get out of their maladaptive (shame cycle) patterns (habits)?

MH -- How to assist them in developing trust again and feel safe in the world

gb -- 1. How does one approach the complexity of Inherited Generational Trauma? 2. How does one work with the heart trauma that comes from the severe betrayal of being emotionally incested and abused within the family growing up?

BV -- I'd like to hear about denial more. I often find when working with clients that denial is what is keeping people stuck iand n poor relationship with self and others.

What is the most affective way to help someone out of denial and more into acceptance and understanding. What I see is so much avoidance so I'd love to hear more about this as well.
MSF -- What can I do when I encounter a client who is challenging to work with and doesn’t accept that they have experienced trauma, wants to teach you in session how you should do therapy and dominates each session talking. Even when you support the client the way they have asked they complain -- you like everyone don’t understand me’

Question 2 what to do when you don’t want to work a client anymore after realizing you are not the right fit and the client thinks that you are?

KR -- It’s mainly about healing from development trauma. How do we do this ? Do we ever fully heal?

DP -- How do I reach the subconscious programming from early life thqt keeps the client stuck in the wounded victimized perspective with their partner? How do I balance tools for regulation with transformational work?

R -- 1. How do people heal from years of involvement with abusive teachers? 2. How does one restore trust in relationships when almost all relating seems to end in abuse?

B -- How to heal from sexual abuse and co abuse (enabling parent e.g.)by a relative (e.g. stepfather, grandfather)?

Healing from subtle narcissistic abuse (emotional, verbal, financial etc.) by a long-term "partner" and parent.

LMC -- Does this work really make a difference in peoples lives?

What is the most important approach to relational healing?

AF -- - How do you best do relational work when you are continuously working through your own relational history? Or more specifically, what are the best ways to continue fostering à safe and secure surrogate attachment figure when this was not something that has been familiar for a long time?

ES -- How can trauma effect a person for so many years afterwards. 2) How can I be instrumental in the healing process?

GS -- 1. How to interveen in a relational-expiriential way. 2. How can you work on the trauma in a corrective way.

P -- Are the trainers abuse survivers? Is there proccess focus on perpetrators?

KR -- How to heal or work with relational trauma to help ourselves/ others heals, (so trauma doesnt get in the way) and able to create meaningful relationships? How to lean into healthy relationships when closeness still feel unsafe in the nervous system?

MS -- When to stay grounded centered and still open to the relationship or when to move on.

JC ---  I would like to know more about how to teach my clients self regulation. Would love more simple techniques to demonstrate to them through telehealth

WT ---  How is it different in working with developmental trauma and shock trauma? How do these traumas show up differently in a person?

K ---  1) How does breathwork enable the nervous system to move to calmer states during triggered trauma incidents? 2) Why would discussing past micro aggressions trigger a warm sensation in the thymus gland area and/ or flight or fight responses?

MD ---  How trauma impacts self esteem, self concept and confidence

LTB ---  Does the training prepare us to work with anyone regardless of the type of trauma? How do we provide ourselves the ongoing support we need when supporting others on a daily basis that are dealing with trauma?

PJ ---  How can I know more quickly if someone’s presentation is due to a shock trauma vs developmental / personality structures?

N ---  - How do we adapt work for TAY? If at all?- Can you offer training on group trauma work?

D ---  How can I help someone find grounding and regulation within themselves when their defensives and emotional armoring are chronically activated? What’s the best way to bring awareness to a clients subconscious patterns in a way that they don’t feel wrong or bad about them?

EP ---  One: when is somatic work contraindicated or how to prepare clients for this work who may re-experience trauma while tuning into somatic cues. Two: I love hearing case studies and tangible examples of how particular skills are put into practice. Thanks so much for all your hard work! Looking forward to the training. 

FG ---  What therapeutic approach works best to help individuals reconnect to, value, and provide important self-care to themselves after long term (even lifelong) effects of unsuspected (recently recognised/acknowledged) trauma? What are the most effective ways to encourage self-care --- how can therapists assist the individual to become motivated from within to implement self-care?

KO ---  Assessing and calibrating pendulation with clients; how to describe the somatic approach to clients who may be unfamiliar with it.

SH ---  How to work with highly guarded /disassociated people? 

LR ---  Will you include any type of marketing strategies for holistic healers/entrepreneurs that want to offer Trauma Therapy in their healing practices that are not licensed in psychotherapy or a traditional social worker or clinical background? Will you offer Optional payment plans that are affordable? This is always a barrier to entry for practitioners that have limited financial resources/income and are challenged with meeting the training schedule to completion.

LB ---  Have you trialled the training  ( with actual CPTSD  or PTSD clients, to see what type of participants/ individual it will help people with. As everyone is triggered or will react differently to different approaches

H ---  What are some tools help break the cycle of betrayal [others than self] caused by trauma? What work can people focus on while they are still in a relationship or ongoing situation where trauma is occurring.

JP ---  How to help people release / move through trauma response and how to move past+ replace limiting beliefs

EG ---  What are the best somatics-based processes to use with different kinds of trauma? And what kinds of questions are best paired with these activities?

EP ---  How to navigate getting someone to open up about their trauma How to navigate a potentially triggering conversation with a individual who can get aggressive in response to their trauma

MD ---  Best immediate reaction if client is triggered by your suggestions or anything else really? What are the introductory questions to establish what the trauma is, what intensity it is, what usually triggers?

RB ---  Confidentiality, the envoirnment

KV ---  I'm working with students with PTSD and CTSD since we have lived two national traumatic events since 2018. Given that I want to help them balance their brain:1. What are your recommendations to deal with kids and teens? 2. Are there variations I should consider since their brains are still forming?

sw ---  I would like to understand my own emotional trauma more completely and the way that it affects how I interact with others on a personal and professional level.  I would like to have time to practice verbal communication to speak and learn a broader vocabulary to describe what I am feeling

SC ---  If the person has a meltdown during a session, how to bring them back to neutral? How to rewire core beliefs that have been based on trauma?

AG ---  How does trauma impact behaviour and performance? What are the most effective strategies to support someone who has experienced trauma?

Mj ---  How to make a client more aware of the patterns they are following How to deal with a client who has a positive benefit also with the trauma

GO ---  What is the effect of in utero trauma - mothers emotional state and substance abuse - on brain and nervous system development? How do we help a client process pre verbal memories ?

AL ---  How to make sure the work is neither too much (overwhelm) or too little (no change happening)?

L ---  What type  trauma if any do we not work with and refer on? BE ---  I would love to learn: When is the right time to address and honour the patients trauma experience/ story; and when is the time to acknowledge when the trauma maybe limiting the patient? Are there types of Trauma that cannot be resolved, where it is more beneficial to just be?

G ---  How can I be sure that I'm going at the client's pace, not reducing their experience, not overpowering or projecting on them, or basically not doing anything that could retraumatize them?How do I know when to refer someone to a trauma specialist? How can I protect myself against secondary trauma? What are the different types of trauma and how are they addressed differently?

CH ---  What are the fundamental differences between working with people who have trauma than those who don’t? I saw recently that up to 20% of the population has experienced trauma. Is there a way to identify such individuals or is it better to assume everyone who I work with could have experienced trauma?

PMG ---  I need to understand more in depth how biologically specific areas of the brain are triggered - perhaps how the chemistry changes

Aj ---  how do you work with people that show resistance or initial inability to tap into their body or their imagination/power of visualization?

CM ---  The shame component of trauma do not get airtime in the general trainings. 

H ---  How to create a group environment that both gives support and guidance to the individual participants journeys without “capping” them. Related: How to take 1on1 skills and apply them to a group setting.

AH ---  Can trauma be released through energetic healing work? I see and work with white light healing, and have had some profound results. I come from a very academic background, but since have a profound spiritual awakening, and literally can see energy, I'd be interested to know about this.

CS ---  How do I know I'm able to 'cope' or handle whatever arises. What happens if someone is suicidal or I'm worried for their wellbeing and I cannot get hold of someone to refer them onto?

tl ---  Commonalities and differences in the trauma experience and minimising the risk of blanket approach to trauma management.

lh ---  1. How , what level of importance ought we give to the " theraputic relationship " in this work ? 2. How to understand whats going on in the brain and mind of the effected/affected person who has sufferred/is suferring  trauma reactions ?

LM ---  How to get the breaks off inside me.....the stuckness. The inner alarm will it ever stop. How to take off the inner breaks and turn off the alarm.

NC ---  What techniques best suit people with limited mobility?

CG ---  How to apply the right tools at the right time when working with a client? As I progress with my studies ( I am not a scientist or researcher), where do I find the most respected resources to keep up with brain science as it pertains to trauma?

t ---  I would be interested how mindfulness & quiet related to trauma. I've had patients who find meditation/quiet to be a trigger because they can't handle that environment. How do you apply grounding and calm to someone who cannot handle calm?

SL ---  How to shift from talk therapy mode into a somatic exercise- how to logistically create that safety container/segue both into and back out of  — and the practice of these entrances and exists so it’s an embodied skill. Practice with understanding how much is enough, how deep to go, how to ensure the person is safe when they leave my office - and not just a re-triggered being.  What constitutes a safe experience- what if they are retraumatized and we can’t (because I’m inexperienced) finesse / find a completion cycle. What constitutes a completion cycle? Practice practice practice!

VW ---  Hi Albert ! What I think is needed to enhance the course is more somatic practices tools to assist trauma survivors ground their body and energy systems, alternative methods beyond just breath work,tapping , meditation,energy work,include the energy work to team up with the science work so the program informs, and gives practioners new tools to sweeten the healing making patients self sufficient in a sustainable way beyond the practitioner, worksheets, links, resources and hands on experiences.

BCR ---  -When people are able to narrate the trauma, but still do not want to allow emotions in the room after months of therapy... anything we could do or just allow "at their own time"? Practical exer ise for people to self regulate and others to do during sessions are always welcome. (:

JK ---  Ways to keep myself co-regulated and healthy when working in toxic environments and seeing many people in need. Helping others understand the importance of seeing where their inner needs are having negative affects on others in their classrooms or working environments. Overcoming the fear or blocks that are holding them back.

DB ---  How do you get to the place in the middle of facing the trauma while remaining in the present, so that the trauma parts can begin to trust the you now, that it's safe and ok to begin to let go and heal? When there are so many layers to trauma, especially with someone with CPTSD, what are ways to help them be able to step into the peace of all the healing work they've already done, and not stay in the "comfort" of their trauma parts?

LB ---  How does trauma impacts your body, emotions and help form beliefs systems in you.  Embodied trauma - Polyvagal Nerve

MM ---  1. How do we help clients move more deeply into painful implicit memory and to facilitate memory reconsolidate. 2. How do we move from a more traditional talk therapy approach to using a more somatic approach when clients are not used to this and may be wary.

WS ---  Best way to initiate conversation when client doesn’t recognize life experiences as “trauma” but their nervous system and behavioral programs do.

CC ---  As a sexuality educator I work often with couples..while I have many tools for those who have experienced trauma I am in need of more tools to support the partner.

MF ---  How to clear somatic symptoms

PC ---  How can a trauma survivor effectively self-advocate for their needs at work, home, and in life to balance their wellbeing, productivity, and integration into society?

ER ---  How do I address trauma I don't remember, or don't fully remember? I struggle to deal with anxiety and worst case scenario thinking. How can I deal with these in the moment?

O ---  How can I prevent retraumatising my client through recanting the trauma?  Is there aftercare tools clients can leave with to help support them in between sessions?

AC ---  What happens if a client can’t remember the trauma

W ---  1) How does someone learn to trust again and open their heart? 2) How do you let go of fear?

JF ---  How to hold a safe place for the client What to do when my own stuff gets triggered

K ---  1) How to effectively work through trauma 2) What are the best practices to stay trauma free

CM ---  1-How to work with & get rid of that gnawing feeling of “not being good enough” along with the disabling powers of being counterproductive in life??!!?!?! 2- Working with negative thinking patterns ¦ How to weaken those demons & replace them with healthy energy of love & compassion??!!?!?!

MMM ---  Getting more deeply into how to care for the body part the client identifies as being affected by the trauma

Lm ---  How can we help blend parts that struggle to meet each other through fear

JM ---  How not to retraumatise clients Learn interventions that really work

M ---  How do I know when my client is in dissociation

TW ---  1. How do you make sure that no one leaves a class triggered and not stabilized & resourced, esp. when teaching groups online?

I ---  My top question is about working with people that seemed to be stuck in the same paradigm or pattern, no matter how much work they do, such a veterans. Also, I would like to be able to help with the underlying feelings of shame, guilt and unworthiness.

SF ---  How to deal with avoidance.

F ---  1) Gaining deep understanding & working with strong ambivalences, and double-binds 2) Ways to work with & integrate charge/arousal - e.g. when good feelings start to get triggering, or when (sexual) arousal itself flips into getting a trigger

AW ---  What are some techniques I can use to immediately alleviate  or diffuse suffering when individuals' traumas have been triggered? These triggers usually occur at moments of crisis and can be very distressful.

AC ---  1. How to not shame yourself for reliving complex trauma when it arises? 2. How to shift your identification with trauma as an aspect of personality?   

b ---  is this geared specifically for therapists? Although I'm a physician, I  work with folks outside of a clinic in a coaching capacity and want to know if the course would be suitable in this scope.

HW ---  1. Addressing adoptee separation trauma 2. Addressing adoptee stranger placement trauma

EC ---  1. How can I help someone come down when they are highly triggered -  beyond breathwork. 2. Somatic issues related to attachment .

IW ---  Somatically do we work differently with developmental trauma vs adult trauma?

DW ---  1. Working with medical trauma guidelines 2. Somatic cues that we can notice as providers

CM ---  1-Changing habits & brain patterns is SO DEEP & DIFFICULT --- will u be teaching us how to counteract this very difficult task in a way that REALLY WORKS so as to stop falling back into these old patterns?

DM ---  Good stabilization skills, infographic promo

CM ---  Sometimes I’m too hurt to be nice to anyone--- it’s sooooo subconscious tho’& I can end up hurting others which I feel very bad about afterwards & then end up hating myself for it

VU ---  Techniques to calm traumatised people attending  a peer support group setting How to prevent triggering the trauma response

A ---  1.What coping strategies and techniques can I manage severe anxiety during triggering moments? 2. Are there any additional resources for support networks available outside of this class that aCan assist me in my journey of healing from trauma and mangings anxiety?

YF ---  How to skillfully perceive the pace of therapy in order to avoid re-traumatizing? Is there a way to keep contact (not necessarily too often) to get feedback on cases?

EM ---  Does trauma need acknowledgement from the individual and if so how to unpack it when there’s complex addiction and mental health issues. How to address sleep trauma.

CC ---  1) How to help with hyperarousal when highly triggered during couple's therapy.  2) Healing of childhood trauma/attachment injuries during couple's sessions.

RG ---  How do you help handling the alters created through trauma and the system balance ?What practical methods and techniques you can use to manage the memories surfacing (and their consequences on the cns) from the dissolution of amnesiac barriers ?

DZ ---  We talked about the parasympathetic nervous system (Fight, flight, freeze and fawn, and what are some of the effects that we experience.  I would like to put together a chart of what are the signs (cues) of trauma, the physical (internal), and (external or non-verbal), the facial cues , the emotional cues, even spiritual cues, verbal cues... How can we be better attuned to our clients and the subtlties  of how trauma shows up. And as mentioned above, I know we cover some of that in the courses you offered.   I'm thinking in regard to "healthcare workers" I know this is more specific, but how do we better teach our healthcare workers on the signs to look for and the entry dialogs to make people feel safe and share honestly -- where they could literally have an impact on saving a life (helping to direct them out of harm) --- I know, this question might be way in left field. Thank you for asking for our thoughts. I would be curious what kind of questions that bubbled up from such an invitation to share. God bless you and your team as you put finishing touches on this new program. May it bear fruit to all who attend this next cohort.

K ---  What is the most effective way to help someone move stored trauma through their body? How can I teach holistic trauma healing as someone without a masters degree or beyond? Trauma healing is my passion and my desired career focus. I have big plans and goals but I am not able to finance further college education at this point.

DA ---  1. How to practice navigating your responses when conflict arise with loved ones. 2. how to help support loved ones to feel heard without stopping their need to express strong emotions in an effort to restore normalcy.

RAE ---  How do you prevent those training from not getting re-traumatized, how do you help them or remind them to contain themselves in practical exercises, that this is not therapy in and of itself.

 

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